To our Rainbow Baby, Eva Joy, did you know I call you our rainbow baby? That’s because you have a brother or sister who’s in heaven with Jesus. We miss him a lot. But we now know that we have you in our lives instead! You were living in my tummy when what would have been your angel sibling’s birthday. That was hard, but the hope of holding you in my arms helped me get through. My pregnancy with you was fraught with fear, especially for the first few weeks because of my fear of another miscarriage. The first time I saw your little heart beating at 8 weeks pregnant was amazing! The ultrasound technician even said she could see you move! I was nervous at every scan I had when you lived in my tummy because I was afraid there would be a time they couldn’t find your heartbeat. But they found it every time. We even found out you’re a girl! I asked God to help me enjoy my pregnancy with you. I made an extra effort this time. I even shared about this pregnancy on my blog, which is something I never did with Asher. New life isn’t something to take for granted. I wish I could teach you about how short life is, but it’s something that you have to experience first hand to understand. Even God says in His Word that life is short, just a vapour. In the story of Noah, God put a rainbow in the sky after he had flooded the earth to promise that He’d never destroy the whole earth with a flood again. The rainbow is a sign that God always keeps His promises. God is sovereign. That means He always knows what He’s doing. He knew what He was doing when He told us to wait for you. We call you our rainbow baby because you were born after we lost a child, but you’re also our rainbow baby because God gave you to us as a reminder of His faithfulness. We love you, Eva Joy. We also love and miss our baby who’s now with Jesus. That doesn’t change our love for you. We are very thankful that God had us wait even though it wasn’t the path Daddy and I had in mind. The pain and the grief was difficult. The waiting and uncertainty was hard. The hope of meeting you was exciting. Now you’re in our arms, and we’re overjoyed. God has a special plan for your life. Just remember that when things get hard, He always (always, always) knows what He’s doing and He keeps his promises! Love, Mummy xoxo.
I know I write “letters” to Eva Joy each month, but this one is in memory of our baby who went to be with Jesus, the baby who would have been her brother (or sister).
