Several weeks ago, I took on a little photography project called “100 Steps.” The assignment was simple. Go out for a walk—start from anywhere, take 100 steps and take a photo. No moving from where I stopped. What if the scene was boring when I stopped? I had to get creative and see things from different perspectives with my camera’s lens. I had to change my perspective.
Any time you have a jolting change to your life, your perspective will change. My perspective on life wasn’t very good for awhile after the loss of our angel baby. I couldn’t understand why God would take away a child if children were supposed to be a blessing. As time went on and as I sought God throughout my grief, I began to see how our angel baby was a blessing.
I’m also reminded of how we must live in the present, trust God with our future and not dwell too much on what could have been. When the due date of our angel baby came and went last year, I was tempted to dwell on the fact that we should have a baby in our arms then. It was a day filled with mixed emotions because I was also pregnant with Eva Joy at the time. I was thankful for where God had me at that moment, but grieving the loss of our angel baby.
Almost 2 years after suffering a miscarriage, I still don’t understand why God took this sweet baby. I’m also thankful for the gift of our rainbow baby. The thing I’ve learned is the need look around where God has you to see the many blessings that he’s given even in the hardship. Because He is good. We may not understand what He’s doing (at the time, or ever), but He still knows what He’s doing.
